Mga bagay na nagdaan.
Bawat pagsubok na nilabanan.
May tanong na gumugulo
sa isipang hindi mapakali,
"Kakayanin ko pa kaya?"
Sa tuwing ika'y nakikita
lalo pa't nakakausap.
Araw ko'y kumukulay
Tila ba wala ng kulang.
Ngunit sa tuwing wala
na akong kasama
hindi mapigilang sumagi sa isip
kung puwede ba talagang maging tayo
Kung iisipin ay imposible
kung susubukan marahil ay maging posible
Ayoko na sanang umasa pa
Lalo't ngang ika'y sa kanya na.
Sadyang itong makasariling puso
hinihiling na ika'y mapasa akin,
siya iyong iwanan at tayo'y magsama
habang buhay...
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Will you still love me in the morning?
It was breaking dawn, a girl woke up from a wretched dream. not a nightmare though, something lesser than that. she merely understood. she's confused. something's bothering her. aside from that disoriented dream. and she suddenly doubt... "Are these things will still fall where they should be?". she hope they'll stay.
After several minutes of bubbling and oozing in her cozy bed, she decided to start her day. start her day affirmatively, like there's nothing wrong. but can she hold in it?...
The day flew well.. or did the other way around...
no, no, no..
"everything will still be okay. no matter what. i need to hold on. this faith. how small it is. it can surpass this." those words. those little words. mimicking in her mind. pushing her to still fight for something she doesn't even know what those are.
as the day go on. the time flew the way they always have. rapidly.
she keep on fighting. hoping that nothing will fall apart... keeping her strength, the best way she can. hoping that whatever endeavor is facing her will fortunately just all disappear..
"HELP! HELP! HELP!" she shouted but no one seems listening..
The tears they're falling. the gravity's too strong and it's impossible to hold them back. after all. it's the only way she can do to cease her aching heart from total wreckage...
The time she decided to let go. is also the same moment she felt something more like a strong glue that's pulling her back.
She doesn't want to be left out. it's like asking to yourself.. "what else am i made for?"
Did she really deserved this? How mean did she bacame to be in this faulty situation...
she doesn't really know..
and she can only do is to cry...not in the outside but on somewhere nobody can ever see she's suffering.
After several minutes of bubbling and oozing in her cozy bed, she decided to start her day. start her day affirmatively, like there's nothing wrong. but can she hold in it?...
The day flew well.. or did the other way around...
no, no, no..
"everything will still be okay. no matter what. i need to hold on. this faith. how small it is. it can surpass this." those words. those little words. mimicking in her mind. pushing her to still fight for something she doesn't even know what those are.
as the day go on. the time flew the way they always have. rapidly.
she keep on fighting. hoping that nothing will fall apart... keeping her strength, the best way she can. hoping that whatever endeavor is facing her will fortunately just all disappear..
"HELP! HELP! HELP!" she shouted but no one seems listening..
The tears they're falling. the gravity's too strong and it's impossible to hold them back. after all. it's the only way she can do to cease her aching heart from total wreckage...
The time she decided to let go. is also the same moment she felt something more like a strong glue that's pulling her back.
She doesn't want to be left out. it's like asking to yourself.. "what else am i made for?"
Did she really deserved this? How mean did she bacame to be in this faulty situation...
she doesn't really know..
and she can only do is to cry...not in the outside but on somewhere nobody can ever see she's suffering.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
patay tinoyo!!!
and that's the reason behind this blog. wala talaga akong planong gumawa ng blog ngayong araw. but just this moment as i open my friendster account and saw the "NEW MESSAGE" flashed in my home page. i wonder who sent it. and when i click it. i'm so glad to see the name "ERIKA" appeared on the unread message. at dali-dali ko itong binuksan.
and here's the story...
Pag basa ko ng message niya. Laking tuwa ko. For such a long time nag-message ulit siya sa akin. I really don't know what to say in that very moment. I just told stories about these past days. And then, suddenly bigla kong na-realize na it's been two years simula ng umalis siya dito sa bansa to migrate to specifically, Virginia. Habang iniisip ko yung mga pinagsamahan namin two years ago. Bigla namang din pumasok sa isip ko ang tanong na ito: "Ano nga pala kami nung nakalipas na dalawang taon?" At ang sagot na tumatak sa isip ko... "My god! dami na rin palang nangyari sa mga taon na lumipas. May mga nagbago(syempre). May mga nanatiling ganoon pa rin pero nangingibawbaw ung mga nagbago na. Ang hirap mang isipin at kumbinsihin ang sarili na may mga pagbabago na pilit kong tinatanggap hanggang ngayon. Yung bang mga bagay na minsan pumasok sa isip mo tapos sabay sabi na, "Sana hindi na lang to nagbago, sana ganoon pa rn siya tulad nung una." Pero ganoon talaga. May mga bagay na sadyang kelangan magbgo. sbi nga nla. "CHANGING is part of GROWING" Habang nalaki tayo may mga bagay na kailangan ding magbago for the sake of being mature. Pero ang maganda dito may mga bagay na ikinatutuwa mong nagbago sila at hindi nanatili sa mga lumang anyo nito.
Hai. grabe! I never expected that that simple message was able to remind me of something that I can't take off of my mind. Yung bang simpleng mensahe eh nagdulot ng isang malaking kaisipan na pinagmulan ng isang malaking usapan katulad nito.
Life is actually a really interesting topic. Sa dami ng fields na meron nito ang isang tao hindi mo maisip kung saan hihinto ang usapan. Mula sa lovelife biglang mapupunta sa future na hindi mo namamalayan na naguusap na rin kayo tungkol sa mga magulang niyo. hahaha!!!
but you know, what really amazes me is the fact that one certain topic let other topics to blossom within a conversation... tulad nga nito. sa simpleng mensahe na ipinadala sa akin ng kaibigan ko...na habang dinidiscuss ko eh biglang may sumingit na mga bagay-bagay. Sa totoo lang matagal na rin namang panahon simula ng hinayaan ko ang sarili akong mga daliri na magtype ng magtype tungkol sa kahit anung idikta ng utak ko. kaya why not let my thoughts soar while it last. who knows? baka ito na naman ang huling topic na mai-open ko sa loob ng ilang buwan...
and here's the story...
Pag basa ko ng message niya. Laking tuwa ko. For such a long time nag-message ulit siya sa akin. I really don't know what to say in that very moment. I just told stories about these past days. And then, suddenly bigla kong na-realize na it's been two years simula ng umalis siya dito sa bansa to migrate to specifically, Virginia. Habang iniisip ko yung mga pinagsamahan namin two years ago. Bigla namang din pumasok sa isip ko ang tanong na ito: "Ano nga pala kami nung nakalipas na dalawang taon?" At ang sagot na tumatak sa isip ko... "My god! dami na rin palang nangyari sa mga taon na lumipas. May mga nagbago(syempre). May mga nanatiling ganoon pa rin pero nangingibawbaw ung mga nagbago na. Ang hirap mang isipin at kumbinsihin ang sarili na may mga pagbabago na pilit kong tinatanggap hanggang ngayon. Yung bang mga bagay na minsan pumasok sa isip mo tapos sabay sabi na, "Sana hindi na lang to nagbago, sana ganoon pa rn siya tulad nung una." Pero ganoon talaga. May mga bagay na sadyang kelangan magbgo. sbi nga nla. "CHANGING is part of GROWING" Habang nalaki tayo may mga bagay na kailangan ding magbago for the sake of being mature. Pero ang maganda dito may mga bagay na ikinatutuwa mong nagbago sila at hindi nanatili sa mga lumang anyo nito.
Hai. grabe! I never expected that that simple message was able to remind me of something that I can't take off of my mind. Yung bang simpleng mensahe eh nagdulot ng isang malaking kaisipan na pinagmulan ng isang malaking usapan katulad nito.
Life is actually a really interesting topic. Sa dami ng fields na meron nito ang isang tao hindi mo maisip kung saan hihinto ang usapan. Mula sa lovelife biglang mapupunta sa future na hindi mo namamalayan na naguusap na rin kayo tungkol sa mga magulang niyo. hahaha!!!
but you know, what really amazes me is the fact that one certain topic let other topics to blossom within a conversation... tulad nga nito. sa simpleng mensahe na ipinadala sa akin ng kaibigan ko...na habang dinidiscuss ko eh biglang may sumingit na mga bagay-bagay. Sa totoo lang matagal na rin namang panahon simula ng hinayaan ko ang sarili akong mga daliri na magtype ng magtype tungkol sa kahit anung idikta ng utak ko. kaya why not let my thoughts soar while it last. who knows? baka ito na naman ang huling topic na mai-open ko sa loob ng ilang buwan...
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